Love from the Eyes of the Frog Prince

The last few days I haven’t had any profound meditations. Every day I seek wisdom and guidance in the form of meditation. I am going to write another post about my meditation and use of creative imagery. I have had some people tell me that this is something I shouldn’t do. But, I have prayed about and read scripture. There is nothing in the Bible that says you can’t have an imagination.

Today I went to my sanctuary. Inside my sanctuary, there was a bed. My spirit guide has been telling me the importance of rest. It renews your mind, your body, and your spirit. For the last few days, all I have seen were frogs hopping around my sanctuary. I have been trying to clean my sanctuary of all the frogs so I can have peace.

Well, not surprisingly, in my bed was a frog. I talked to my spirit guide about how this frog wasn’t going to just magically turn into a prince. And then I started thinking about ways to get the frog to hop out of my bed. But, the frog loves me and keeps coming back.

When I was done meditating, I read the story of the frog prince and I cried. You see, it’s hard to see love from the eyes of the frog when you’re the princess. When you’re the princess, you’re looking for a prince. But what the frog has is peace, happiness, and contentment with his circumstances. Yes, he is happy just being a frog. Even though he knows he is a prince.

Today I read this poem and realized exactly how fortunate I am to have a frog in my bed.

I want to give credit for this image. I am not sure who created it. Image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/251990541621788446/

Always Taken Care of

Yesterday I had this thought. I have never been one of those girls that were taken care of. What I mean is, I have never been a stay-at-home mom that just had some guy taking care of me. I long for childhood sometimes because I really hate adulting. Sometimes I just want someone to do all the adulting for me so I don’t have to deal with the stress.

This morning I woke up to some blue energy. The life of an entrepreneur means not having a steady consistent income, especially in the beginning. Even though I have done this before and know what I am up against, it doesn’t make it any easier. I have said before in one of my interviews that it takes a lot of faith to deal with the highs and lows of being an entrepreneur, I genuinely mean this. Having faith is easy when everything is going your way. But, when you don’t know how you’re going to pay your next bill or keep your business going for another month, it is really hard to have faith. This is why James said, “the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” It’s one of my favorite Bible verses. I think it’s no coincidence that I memorized the book of James as a teenager. It’s stuck with me.

So this morning, my meditation didn’t bring me a lot. I didn’t have some remarkable vision or metaphor or story to share. But, what I did realize today was that I AM taking care of. I am always taken care of. I am the child and have a father that always takes care of me. This morning I woke up to some much-needed “blue energy”, aka financial resources to keep my business going. Whenever I worry about money, he always provides for me. I have to remind myself regularly to ask for this “give us this day our daily bread”. Maybe I am not rolling in the dough, and maybe I don’t have all my spiritual life figured out. But, I do know this. Ask and it will be answered. Seek and you will find. Doing my best to share the blue energy with others.

Studying the aliens (AKA depression/mood tracker)

Sigh, debating on how much I care about search engine optimization. As an SEO consultant, and blogger, writing stuff that gets found in Google means traffic to your blog. As a creative free spirit, and genuine blogger, writing what I want to say is more important. My goal for this blog is to blog every day. I want to write “articles” but I also want to have an online journal that I write on every day. It’s a goal. I missed yesterday because I had nothing to say. I wasn’t inspired, meditation didn’t give me much, but today I got a lot out of meditation.

I woke up with morning depression. I have this happen all the time and it’s something I have been trying to learn how to deal with. Sometimes the depression goes away by mid-day, but sometimes it lingers for days. I always refer to this as aliens visiting. Last week I meditated about having “coffee with the aliens’. Apparently, I didn’t blog about it, but what I mean by that is learning how to have company with the aliens but not let them take over your life. Let them visit, but don’t let them wreak havoc. Basically, learning to accept depression as part of your life and stop fighting with it. Let it come and let it go.

Well this morning, I woke up with another headache and morning depression. My headaches and moods seem to go together. When I meditated I told my spirit guide, I need a teacher. I don’t have anyone to help me. I have lots of mentors but none with bipolar disorder. I saw myself in a classroom and my spirit guide was teaching the class. She told me to start taking notes.

Then I saw the classroom filled with aliens, all sitting at their desks. I thought, “I don’t want to kill them.” I found this peace with them — like I don’t want to kill you. You’re visiting for a reason. She told me to start studying them. I have been journaling regularly. I have tried to destroy the aliens, fight the aliens. I have tried all kinds of strategies, but they always come back. And with my bipolar, there’s a little bit of a pattern to it. I always know when their coming. Usually, when I have been “happy” for too long. It’s a cycle -up, down, up, down. Us bipolar people like to stay manic to avoid visits from the aliens. But it doesn’t work.

So today she told me to start an alien tracker. And that’s what I’ve done. I am going to start documenting as many things as I can to see if I can figure out some patterns. What makes the aliens come out and play. Can I see a visual pattern? Is there anything I can do to change the cycles?

My depression cycles have disrupted my life for so long. I am not trying to beat it. I am trying to study it and learn from it. I don’t think we have studied the dynamics of depression enough. It’s more than just taking a pill. There has to be some scientific explanations for this. Anyway, I am logging my aliens. I will report back later with my findings.

Flunk the F Students and Work with the As

This morning I woke up with a headache and tons of tension in my neck and shoulder. My house is super clean as I have been working on my habits, but doing habits consistently means not having time to play catch up. I am trying to stop the letting things build up and mad catching-up cycles in my life. So, no matter what I am sticking with the habits and routines I have created and getting a good night’s sleep every night.

Still, when I meditated I was back to sitting at this desk with more papers than I knew what to do with. Yesterday, I got some insight on how to deal with the boring aspect of my work. ADHD people don’t like doing the mundane, monotonous boring stuff you have to do in life… So we procrastinate, do something we want to do instead, meanwhile the stuff piles up. Then stress and tension hits in!

So today I was at the desk again, with this ginormous stack of papers. I told my spirit guide, even if I make this less boring, and work faster, there are still just way too many papers for me to handle. That’s when I got it. My meditations are always visual and metaphors. She told me to start going through the papers one by one, grading them, and throw the F’s in the trash.

It occurred to me that this is much like parenting, and other things in our lives. The whiny, demanding, attention needy brat gets all your attention because they won’t shut the hell up. Meanwhile, the A student kid who gets up early does her chores and doesn’t cause problems gets neglected. My spirit guide told me to start flunking the F students and move them out of my class.

Start working with the A students who are motivated, patient, nice, don’t whine, and annoy you until you cave and do what they want. Stop working with the Fs and start working with the people you like, that value your time and your talents.

So with that, I have started marking my to-do list with who I consider my “A students”. The people I actually like working with and want to keep as clients. And flunking the Fs. They are slowly going to be weeded out of my classroom as I work on creating my own elite school of All-Star, motivated, passionate, hard-working and positive people.